


Stealing Kisses: If You Don't Like Them You're Welcome to Return Them

by raspbirry_pancakes



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders is Bad at Feelings, I don't make the rules except for when I do and I do all the time, M/M, Roman is bad at explaining, Sanders Sides movie night, Virgil is oblivious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-16
Updated: 2020-02-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:28:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22733308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raspbirry_pancakes/pseuds/raspbirry_pancakes
Summary: It was a fluke, Virgil was sure of it. Roman kissing him was just one of those weird four AM ideas people usually took action to after lack of sleep. Virgil knows plenty about them. And even if it wasn’t a random four AM thought, it was probably just Roman’s instinctual reaction to show affection to the first person he sees after such a long binge with no outside interaction from the other Sides.So yeah, it was just a fluke.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 11
Kudos: 160





	Stealing Kisses: If You Don't Like Them You're Welcome to Return Them

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [I Always Have to Steal My Kisses from You](https://archiveofourown.org/works/351907) by [blue_jack](https://archiveofourown.org/users/blue_jack/pseuds/blue_jack). 



“Am I alive?” Roman asked tiredly, eyes barely managing to meet Virgil’s as he cutely smushed his cheek against the desk. 

“Unfortunately so. Looks like you’ll have to keep bugging us for the rest of our lives,” Virgil answered dryly, tugging Roman gently out of his desk chair. 

Princey had been on another creative binge for nearly three days now, pumping out ideas faster than Logan could analyze them or Virgil could pick out the faults in them. Virgil still wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not. 

“You’d miss me terribly if I was gone,” Roman smirked, leaning heavily on the other’s side. Virgil held him steadily, one arm wrapped around his waist the other holding Roman’s arm that was slung over his shoulders, and began to slowly make their way to Roman’s room, since his “office” was just a room over. 

Up close, he could see the exhaustion that seeped through Princey’s every pore, and, not for the first time, he wondered why the other did this to himself. True, the numerous ideas the creative binge supplied gave them a lot of options, but Roman’s non-binge ideas were still good, and definitely way more thought out than the half-baked plans he had during one of his creative fits. 

“You’re right. Who else would I drag to bed at four in the morning every time they went off on a creativity spree?”

Roman just laughed tiredly at that, shifting his weight from Virgil’s side to the doorframe of his room as Virgil struggled to open the door. 

“What can I say? I’m irreplaceable.”

And with that, Roman pressed a kiss to Virgil’s lips and stumbled into his room, the door letting out a soft click as he closed it. Normally, Virgil would’ve insisted on following him in, just to make sure that he made it to bed safely, but Virgil was frozen in place, face feeling warm and heart beating unusually steady after something like that. 

* * *

It was a fluke, Virgil was sure of it. It was just one of those weird four AM ideas people usually took action to after lack of sleep. Virgil knows plenty about them. In fact, he’s been the cause of some of Thomas’s, and often encourages him to follow through with those thoughts sometimes, leading to some very unexpected and hilarious outcomes. And even if it wasn’t a random four AM thought, it was probably just Roman’s instinctual reaction to show affection to the first person he sees after such a long binge with no outside interaction from the other Sides. 

So yeah, it was just a fluke. 

And being the good friend he was, after the next creativity binge- this one lasting four days before Virgil intervened- Virgil was helping Roman to bed and was fully prepared to help out Princey anyway he could, just in case the other needed to release some bottled-up affection. But all Roman did was mumble a sleepy “thanks” before climbing into bed, and promptly falling asleep. 

Not that Virgil minded at all, his best friend’s health was very important to him, and if Thomas seemed a little more irritated and tense than usual the next day, then Virgil was just as clueless as to why as the rest of them. 

* * *

A few days later, the Sides and Thomas are sitting at their usual movie night. Popcorn and candy were scattered everywhere from the usual battle of Who Gets to Sit Next to Patton?, since Patton was the most cuddly out of all of them and everyone wants a cuddle buddy. Virgil wasn’t even sure what the point of the fight was, every movie night ended up the same: Patton curled up next to Logan with Thomas on his other side, sometimes accompanied by Remy (who always made him pass out quickly much to his delight), and Virgil sitting on the other part of the L-shaped couch, Roman usually laying across him in some way. 

Virgil supposed it was just part of movie night tradition. 

There was a time before Virgil was comfortable that he’d sit wherever he felt like that day, usually far away from the others. But one night Roman decided to join him, and from that day on, no matter where he sat on movie night- the top of the couch, facedown on the carpet, the windowsill on the far side of the room- Roman would sit next to him in silence, occasionally making jokes about the plot and poking fun at the characters. It was nice. And one night when Roman sat down on the couch the day after movie night, Virgil followed his example and sat down next to him. It simply was how things were. Roman always sat next to Virgil and Virgil always sat next to Roman. It would’ve been ridiculous to change something that worked. 

A year and a half later and Virgil still would’ve given anything to have a video of Roman’s double take when he sat down next to him on the couch. 

That brought them back to now. Roman was laying across Virgil’s lap, watching the screen with the undivided attention he only gave to some of his best paintings- not that Virgil paid that much attention when the other was creating things, he just happened to notice- as he continued on his rant why the protagonist was going to get with his best friend rather than the supposed “girl of his dreams”. 

He and Virgil had been having this discussion since the beginning scene where the characters had been first introduced. 

“The girl and the guy are going to get together,” Virgil had said simply in response to Roman’s excited squeal at the guy and his best friend’s interaction. That had prompted an offended gasp from him and they had been arguing ever since. 

Remy had long since lulled Thomas to sleep, and Logan and Patton were comfortably curled up into each other and sleeping soundly, leaving Virgil and Roman as the only two watching. 

“It’s still not going to happen."

“Why? Because they don’t have chemistry?” Roman asked sarcastically. “Or do I need to remind you of the fever scene?”

Virgil barely stopped himself from snorting at the ridiculousness of this whole discussion. 

“That’s not what I’m saying. All these movies are the same. No matter how much chemistry two characters share, it doesn’t matter if they’re the same gender because writers never want to allow a gay couple if they can help it.” 

“Not always-”

“Voltron.” 

He and Roman both shuddered. 

“But that’s not the point,” Princey’s eyes flicked away from the screen for the first time that night to meet Virgil’s gaze, “these two have really good chemistry and it’s going to work out.”

“Doubt it,” Virgil muttered, looking back at the movie just in time to see the protagonist hurriedly press his lips to his best friend’s.

“Yes!” Roman whisper-shouted, frantically swatting at Virgil’s shoulder. “I told you!” 

Roman then used the hand on his shoulder to slide behind his neck and pull Virgil down for a kiss. 

Virgil blames parting his lips and leaning into it because of the sudden surprise of it. It _had_ been a while since the first kiss, which is why he wasn’t anticipating it. 

Roman drew back and lied on Virgil’s lap once more, looking completely unfazed, and took to watching the movie once more. 

Virgil stared at the movie too, but for the life of him couldn’t remember a single thing that happened afterwards. 

* * *

Virgil didn’t know how to explain the situation to the others, so he just didn’t. Neither of them were around when it happened, and there wasn’t exactly an easy way to say “Sometimes Roman comes up to me and kisses me for no reason, is this normal?” without sounding like an idiot. Because he knows how it sounds, but it wasn’t like that. 

It wasn’t. 

Besides, Roman’s always been the overly-affectionate type; giving kisses to the hand to the damsels-in-distress he saves, leaning against someone when he has the chance, or just holding hands with people when he feels like it. It’d feel wrong to ask Roman to stop being himself over something so trivial as unorthodox kissing. 

Roman just needed a way to express his affection, and as the most romantic side, he obviously has a lot to give, and Virgil doesn’t mind helping him out a bit. Though he did wish that Roman would make more sense when he did it. Sometimes he would kiss Virgil as soon as he entered a room, or when Roman had a new idea for a video, or when Virgil said a particularly sarcastic comment that had both of them laughing. 

Because of this, Virgil had gotten into the habit of turning towards Roman whenever he heard something interesting. It was a little annoying sometimes that they had different views on what was interesting enough to be considered kiss-worthy, but Virgil was nothing if not a good friend and willing to wait for whenever the sudden mood hit Roman. 

* * *

“It might not be the _best_ idea,” Patton commented sheepishly. 

“You don’t have to say it so lightly, Patton. If it is an incomprehensible idea then just say so,” Logan said evenly, but Virgil could sense the slight anxiety in his stance, worried that someone as open-minded as Patton would shoot him down. 

“On the other hand, I happen to find it a simply _terrible_ plan,” Deceit added in, his smile just a bit too wide and dark at the edges for Virgil’s comfort. 

It was another non-scripted Sanders Sides video. Apparently these gathered the attention of the Fanders better, and got less comments about how “out of character” the Sides were. It was usually a good boost to Thomas’s and the others’ esteem to know that they were being appreciated for their true thoughts and inputs instead of a perfected script, but Virgil always struggled with these episodes. He could sense the others’ anxiety, and in a heated debate like this where everyone wanted to be right, there were plenty of anxious and irritated emotions going around. And in unplanned videos there were no guaranteed happy endings or pre-settled conclusions, so it tended to put him on edge. 

Underneath the view of the camera, Virgil was scratching away away at the skin on his forearm- a nervous tick he had never fully managed to grow out of. His skin was growing red and sensitive, possibly close to drawing blood, but Virgil didn’t notice, trying hard not to focus on the increasing volume of his bickering family or his heartbeat growing rapidly. He was so out of it he barely noticed Roman saying something to the others that got them to sink down, and Virgil definitely didn’t notice him directly in front of him until Princey took his hand and snapped them into Virgil’s room. 

There, Virgil sank to the carpet, no longer able to hold himself up, and held his knees to his chest, squeezing his eyes shut as he struggled to count. Next to him, Roman sat quietly, drumming 4-7-8 with his fingers lightly onto the side of Virgil’s thigh, grounding him, bringing him back. 

Virgil took a while to steady his breathing, and after a while of what he assumed was silence, he was surprised to tune into Roman whispering a story, and by how far he’d been into it, he must’ve been talking for a while, even though he knew Virgil hadn’t been listening or been able to listen. Roman was just talking because he knew at one point, when Virgil would be able to listen again, he would want something to distract him. 

Virgil blamed the weird stutter in his breath as an after-effect of the panic attack. 

“-and I swear that’s the last time I leave Patton alone with a recipe for Crofter’s cookies. It looked like a fucking massacre in the kitchen. There was jam _everywhere._ If I’d known Logan was nearby then maybe I would’ve been more hesitant, but he said he was going to be busy all day for a new video, so I…” Roman trailed off when he saw Virgil’s face peeking up from his knees. 

“Better?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Virgil mumbled quietly, “thanks.”

He tugged on his sleeves and noticed the spot he’d been scratching had a white bandage wrapped around it. He didn’t even _know_ how Roman had managed to do that without him noticing. 

Virgil felt drained from his panic attack and was about to poke at his bandage when he felt a hand under his chin tip his head up and Roman peck him lightly on the lips. 

Roman then stood and picked up Virgil, who might’ve reddened just a bit but it was from the embarrassment of having a panic attack in front of someone else, nothing more, and placed him in his bed, pulling the covers over him softly.

Roman pressed a kiss to his forehead, and left his room silently. Virgil felt his forehead tingle a little where Roman kissed it and tried to ignore the empty feeling that came with his absence. It was something he was beginning to grow accustomed to, the loneliness that only came when he was gone. It wasn’t like Virgil needed to spend all his time with Roman, he just wanted to. To hold Roman’s hand, to kiss him, to just be _around_ him, and-

Oh.

_Oh._

* * *

“I don’t think you should kiss me anymore.”

Roman, who had just sat down next to him at the kitchen table, blinked. 

Virgil spent all night awake thinking about how to end this. A big part of him wanted to keep this up, just pretend that it meant nothing, so that maybe it could stay this way for a while, but Virgil knew better than that. It was unfair to Roman and himself to do this, and it would be easier to end this now than to wait until Virgil fell in love with him, or worse, have Roman end it because he liked someone else. It wouldn’t be easy to end this, but maybe if they stopped kissing then Virgil would stop feeling this way and things could go back to normal. 

“I don’t understand,” Roman looked confused, his gaze only half-awake and hair still ruffled from sleep. 

It was adorably heartwarming and Virgil was more tired than he’s ever felt. 

“I just think we want different things out of this,” Virgil kept his eyes focused on the table in front of him. He roughly bit the inside of his cheek, and began to count the lines in the wooden table as he waited for Roman’s response. 

Virgil counted to twenty-seven and planned to count until at least five hundred lines because by then Roman would’ve finished his part about how he didn’t care and things would go back to normal, and hopefully Roman would leave him alone and Virgil would be able to head back to his room to lick his wounds in private without it being too obvious. 

What he didn’t expect was Roman’s quiet voice asking, “You’re breaking up with me?”

Virgil’s head snapped up to his direction so fast it’s a wonder he didn’t break something. 

“What-"

“A little warning would’ve been nice, but this is so unexpected, especially from you,” Roman spat, standing up. “I really tried in this relationship and I _really_ wanted this to work-”

“Roman-”

“Please don’t say it’s because you met someone else. Logan and Patton are dating so unless it’s Deceit or my brother then you’re out of options.”

“We’re dating?” Virgil asked dumbly. 

Roman furiously stared at him from the edge of the kitchen, “Are you even listening?”

“Not really,” Virgil answered, already making his way over to Roman.

Roman looked ready to hit something, “Are you serious-”

It was the first time Virgil had kissed Roman first, and something about that fact made the kiss just a little better than usual. Roman relaxed against him, the tenseness in his posture seeping away as Virgil leaned against him. 

When they parted, Roman looked hopeful. “Does this mean we’re not breaking up?”

Virgil just laughed and shook his head. 

“Definitely not.”


End file.
